Burying the Triangle

Ah, the refreshing feel of a cool breeze. Fall has arrived in Central Texas and you can feel it, at least in the early morning hours. The air is crisp and carries more moisture. The clarity of the night sky has shifted, too, giving the Moon and stars a sharper image, reminding me of the bigger picture.

How are YOU feeling these days? How are you managing the tension? You can't avoid it, really. It is everywhere we turn: politically, financially, emotionally...Everyone I know seems pushed to their limits of coping.

Big questions are arising as societal illusions crumble beneath the weight of transparency. The underbelly of our lives - secrets that have been hidden in the shadows for decades, some maybe longer - are being exposed, creating waves of conflict between what we thought things were and what they actually are. It's unsettling, to say the least.

When the people we give our trust to are exposed as frauds, who do we trust? When the systems we rely on are exposed as manipulative, what do we rely on? Where do we find comfort when the shadow aspects of our humanity are exposed - those ugly truths that remained safely hidden from our view for so long? Once we've seen them, trying to ignore them is like trying to forget someone you've known your whole life.

It's not possible or pretty. In fact, it's downright ugly. Messy. Scary.

Fear is a funny thing. Fear seduces us into a mode of defensiveness, judgement, and blame. We fear being victimized; we also fear being responsible. We don't want to be victims; nor do we want to be perpetrators of persecution. Yet where we find one, we find the other, plus a third: the rescuer. These three energies feed on each other and thrive together.

It's the ever-living Triangle of Victim-Persecutor-Rescuer...the essential fabric of our most beloved tales.

The funny thing is, until we face what is lurking in the shadows - all the things we fear and reject - until we accept their existence and take responsibility for calling them back to the light, to a place of love, we will suffer. Because until then, we will continue to play out the Victim-Persecutor-Rescuer Triangle, ad infinitum, within our psyches and our lives.

To break free of this Triangle, each and every one of us must recognize our role in it. How do we perpetuate this Triangle? How does it play out in our lives, in our relationships, communities, and society? Which of the three are we - Victim, Persecutor, Rescuer - and how can we stop it? How can we put an end to the Triangle template that currently rules our lives? There is no denying that it does. It's a psycho-emotional epidemic within the human race.

As long as we keep this Triangle in play within our lives, we will live in fear and we will suffer. It is that simple.

During these heated times of debate, opinion, perspective, preference and emotional acting out based in fear, it is important to practice the one bit of wisdom that flows through every channel: LOVE.

Finding LOVE for those we respect and trust is one thing. But can you find LOVE within your heart for those you fear and reject? Disagree with? Detest or loathe? Feel victimized by? Can you recognize that even they are held in the hand of the Divine (because nothing and no one is excluded), and that you are as much a part of the Triangle messiness as they are? 

Perhaps you feel like a Victim at another person's hands. Interestingly, the roles in the Triangle are fluid, meaning each player at some time or another takes on the other roles. We are all Victims, Persecutors and Rescuers to some degree, moving in and out of these roles in different life situations. As an example, consider that if you fear and blame someone for something, you make them a Persecutor and yourself a Victim. By blaming them, however, you become a Persecutor and make them a Victim. If you then set out to protect others from this person, you become a Rescuer and make the others Victims...and the Triangle paradigm continues.

The many problems with this paradigm are obvious, but one big issue with it is that playing these roles is a waste of our time and energy. It gets us nowhere worthy. Nothing will settle into a place of stability as long as we keep this Triangle going. Our time and energy are better spent building a collaborative Circle with others rather than deepening the divisive nature of the Triangle. Yes, life can be a collaborative Circle of peace and LOVE.

Now more than ever, it is time to step out of this exhaustive, destructive Triangle and into a new paradigm of peace-filled co-existence. All we have to do is give up this Triangle game - stop feeding it within ourselves and in our relationships. Yes, if you look, you can identify your very own places of being a Victim. Persecutor, and Rescuer. Remember - we are all all of them. We must ditch our willingness to play this game if we are to have a hope of shifting the ugliness of its drama within our culture at large.

Grab a shovel - a BIG one, not a wimpy gardening one. It's time to put this Triangle to rest six feet under.

Crazy Cloud of Crap

We are now technically into the third week of September and...

Wait a minute...how did we get to September...NINE months into 2016...already??

Don't get me wrong; I will be uber-happy to move beyond this crazy-ass, Nine Fire Monkey year (See my blog from February). But seriously, how did we get through 3/4 of this year already...? It feels like we just celebrated the new year. 

Anyway, moving on...

This month, the heat of Summer is beginning to (subtly) recede as we round the corner toward Autumn. But wow, are things boiling hot! The election hype, the Olympic hype, the violence hype...It's all spinning around us like a tornado, creating a crazy cloud of crap we have to navigate our way through.

Don't delude yourself into thinking you are not impacted by these things. We live in a single, unified field of energy, as all the fish in the ocean do. Waves of energy in the form of vibrations and impulses gently nudge or harshly slam into us, just as they would if we lived in the ocean.

So not one of us is insulated from anything that happens on this planet (or beyond, if you want to go there). What happens, even if on the other side of the globe, impacts us, though we may or may not be consciously aware of it.

How do I know this? Because quantum physics has finally proven it to be so. When stimulated, particles of matter respond to each other, even when separated by thousands and thousands of miles across the globe. We - you, me and everything else here - are particles of matter, constantly responding to the experiences of those around us.

"So what?" you may ask. "What does this mean?"

It means if you find yourself feeling tired, sluggish, overwhelmed, blah, uneasy, perhaps even exhausted or depleted, irritable, angry or ill, your body system is likely struggling beneath the crazy cloud of crap I mentioned earlier. There is no way to escape it...

Well, that is not exactly true. There are things you can do to shield yourself from the influences of these more dense energy vibrations. But they take practice and to practice them, you have to learn them first. Then, you have to do them regularly. The more you do them, the better they work for you.

Some of these things are simple; some are more complex, coming to us from the indigenous, deeply connected cultures of the world. And they work. Really well.

Managing the impact of the crazy cloud of crap on you is twofold. First, take steps to minimize your contact with it. Second, take steps to minimize its impact on your body system.

Here are some things to stop doing to minimize your contact with it:

• Stop bombarding your system. Unplug from screen technology (TV, internet, phone, etc.) as much as possible. If you choose to engage with them, be very specific about why you do and with whom you connect. Don't drown yourself in other people's rhetoric, spin, drama, opinions, and emotional energies. These things penetrate your personal energy field and pollute it with gunk, leaving you feeling low, sluggish and off-balance both physically and emotionally. If anything significant happens, you will hear about it anyway.

• Stop taking things personally. Every single person on this planet has an opinion about what is going on, including you and me. Whether people's opinions are right or wrong, true or not, is irrelevant; they are just people's opinions and people have a right to them. Arguing, rationalizing, explaining - these are all antics of the ego and probably will not change someone else's opinion. Your energy and passion are better spent elsewhere. So let others be, without taking their opinions on as a personal affront.

• Stop neglecting yourself. Your body needs to be energetically nurtured just as it needs to be physically nurtured. When you get "slimed" by crazy clouds of crap, your energy body needs a good cleaning to restore its vibrancy and re-balance its functioning. The better it functions, the less vulnerable you are to the impact of such clouds, and the better you feel.

Here are some things to start doing to minimize its impact on your body system:

• Start spending more time doing things that inspire your senses, like playing, creating, dancing, singing, visiting with others (face to face, not via a screen), or anything else that awakens you (hiking, biking, spending time outdoors, listening to favorite music, cooking, meditating, road tripping, doing yoga, bubble baths, writing, napping, snuggling, etc.). 

• Start trusting in something larger than yourself. Trust that there is more to what is happening than you can possibly comprehend. The tapestry of Life reaches far beyond our full comprehension, so find something bigger than yourself to entrust its design to. Trust that the Divine Source of all things always works with us and never against us, even in the midst of a crazy cloud of crap.

• Start soaking in a hot bath with lots of Epsom salts. This is my favorite way of cleansing the body's energy field of slime. Emerge feeling more vibrant and radiant.

If you find yourself suffering from the crazy cloud of crap spinning around us, give me a call. I've got lots of tools in my toolbox for just this sort of thing.

A word on cops

 
I am not a cop. I am a writer and a teacher and a counselor.

But cops get a bad rap. People call them "pigs" and "buzzkills." People don't want them around. I didn't either, until I met some that weren't packing a speeding ticket book.

Now, I'm not saying that every cop I've ever met is a sweetheart, fine and true. Some are real babies. You name it; every profession comes with babies. 

The difference may be that baby cops carry guns just like honorable cops do; and babies in other professions don't. Well, not as a matter of uniform, anyway. A baby cop with a gun can be lethal...just like any baby person with a gun can be.  

I mean "baby" as in the spiritually immature kind, not the cute, gurgling newborn kind.

Spiritually immature babies are emotionally immature. They operate out of fear, ego, insecurity, and greed. They cling and assume and take things personally. They demand instant gratification. They judge, blame and disrespect. They distort the truth. They carry no real wisdom.

These babies don't know who they are. They are disconnected from their true selves. They compete and conflict with others. They hold themselves as separate from; they are divisive in thoughts and actions. They force their own agendas.

 Make no mistake about it: These babies are spiritual infants, not evolved sages. They are frightened children, not brave warriors. They confuse dominance with power, and control with security. They are misguided and misunderstood. 

Cops are trained killers working on our behalf, or at least, they are supposed to be. Unfortunately, baby cops don't have what it takes to do their job honorably. Neither do baby people of any profession.

Street cops are known as Peace Officers. Jail cops are known as Corrections Officers. Peace and Corrections: two honorable paths intended to restore balance and offer a chance for amends or perhaps even healing; to keep the peace and restore dignity. 

Are some of them spiritually immature babies? Sure; there are babies in every arena. Their actions are not splattered all over the news, but they are there: the therapist who manipulated his clients; the teacher who slept with her students; the doctor who stole medication; the nurse who sexually molested his patients; the priest who molested children; the lawyer who misrepresented his clients; the caregiver who stole from her clients; the sitter who physically abused children; the cop who mistreated citizens...they are all out there. Babies, all of them. 

That does not mean that all therapists, all teachers, all doctors, all nurses, all priests, all lawyers, all caregivers, all sitters or all cops are spiritually immature babies. But some are. 

Let's refrain from making misguided generalizations about members of any group. Let's remember we are all people first, and most people are not babies.


[NOTE: Substitute "asshole" for "baby" and "assholes" for "babies" for this to make more sense.]

The Human

"The Human is sick," he said.

Those around him were uncertain of exactly what he meant. But hearing his story, I knew. It did not happen over night...

When fear rules the heart,
when children are left to starve, 
when weaponizing is the norm,
the Human is sick.

When life's resources are contaminated,
when our Earth's bones are ripped apart,
when we torture and kill its creatures without regret,
the Human is sick.

When texting replaces touching,
when gaming is our play,
when messaging becomes our talking,
the Human is sick.

When excuses replace compassion,
when greed allows apathy,
when rhetoric is spewed as wisdom,
the Human is sick.

When families are broken,
when our elders are forgotten,
when our youth are trapped in poverty,
the Human is sick. 

When our jails are overflowing,
when suffering keeps growing,
when we turn off our inner knowing,
the Human is sick.

Yes my friends, the Human is sick.