What has lust got to do with it?

SEX. LUST. LOVE. HOW DO THEY ALL FIT TOGETHER? 

These famous lyrics by musical group Salt and Pepa highlight a very real conundrum in our intimate relationships:

   Let's talk about sex, Baby

   Let's talk about you and me

   Let's talk about all the good things

   And all the bad things that may be

   Let's talk about sex

[Let's Talk About Sex lyrics © Warner/Chappell Music, Inc]

How do we know if sex is love and not just lust? And can lustful sex turn into real love? What do sex, lust and love have to do with relationships? 

In my women's Facebook group, After A Breakup: Going From Heartache To Happy, a member posted that after some playful flirty texting with her ex-boyfriend, he came over and they had sex. He later asked if they could continue to be intimate, which she agreed to because she really wanted to rekindle their love; she wanted him back (her words).

But does the fact that they text-flirted, got horny and had sex mean there is still a chance for monogamous relationship love between them? Or were they just horny, turned on by flirtexting? What's the difference? When does sex mean love and when does it just mean lust? And can lust be love?

And there it is...that blurred line between sex, lust and love. 


THE BLURRED LINES BETWEEN SEX, LUST AND LOVE

The line between these is so blurred, many women spend years in the back and forth of on-again, off-again relationships, endlessly hoping that great sex means there's a chance at great love. Let's be honest—with happy-ending love stories deeply entrenched in our cultural mythology, it's hard not to secretly wish and hope that the strong sensitive hero we read about in books or see on the screen will show up in real life and be our hero, just at the moment when all seems lost. 

But more often than not, we end up desperately trying to get the person we love so deeply to love us the way we love them. Many of us sacrifice everything for them, for love. Then if the relationship ends, we are devastated! We feel confused, lost, lonely, and hurt. We can't believe the person who said they loved us just walked right out of our lives like we were always disposable to them. Many start new relationships right away, leaving us wondering if they ever loved us at all.

I've been there myself a few times and heard so many stories like this in my work with clients that I sometimes wonder—Is long-term, intimate, loving monogamy possible? Or are we just fooling ourselves, brainwashed by the fairytale endings in our culture?

To beg the question, let me share another story from my group. A member posted that her relationship ended because her partner of several years wants to be polyamorous and she does not. She wants monogamy and marriage. The group jumped all over this, calling the guy an ass and guessing he just wanted "his cake and eat it too." They seemed to take his choice as a personal affront and a sign that the guy did not value her or their relationship enough. They encouraged her to let him go.

But could there be another explanation? Is sexual greed the only possible reason for these types of experiences, or might something else be going on?


LOVE IS NOT BLACK AND WHITE

Before we launch into that discussion, let's get a few terms straight:

• Monogamy—choosing to be in loving, intimate relationship exclusively with one person

• Polyamory—choosing to be in loving, intimate relationship with more than one person and all are in agreement

• Open Relationship—a committed couple who chooses to have playful sexual fun on the side with other people

• Swinger—a person who engages in group sex or the swapping of sexual partners 

What I know for certain is that Human sexuality and relationships are far from black and white. In fact, they are so gray that pretty much anything goes. People break the law to have it the way they want it, as with polygyny (a husband with multiple wives), polyandry (a wife with multiple husbands), and bigamy (having two spouses). These are all illegal in the United States but people do them anyway. And I won't even mention the rest.

In a culture where not only anything goes but where our Human struggles become popular reality TV shows, how do you sort sex from lust from love? Is it even possible? 


WHAT ARE SEX, LUST AND LOVE?

Let's be real. In this context and in the broadest sense of the word, sex is an act. It refers to sexual activity in general, and specifically including intercourse. This can be done with one or more partners, in any location and whether or not there is lust or love present. 

Lust, on the other hand, is a desire and a feeling. For purposes of this article, it means having a very strong sexual desire for someone. Lust can lead to sex and love, but not all sex and love are lust.

And then there's love, the most elusive of the three. Like lust, love is an intense feeling of deep romantic or sexual attraction or affection for someone. Love can lead to lust and sex, but not all lust and sex are love.

Confused yet? So how do you sort sex from lust from love? The sex part is easy because it is an act and not a feeling. But what about lust and love? How do you know if lust is lust, lust is love, love is lust, or love is love? Can you know? 


DO WOMEN AND MEN WANT THE SAME THINGS?

In my experience, most women are looking for love, not sex. And most men are looking for sex, not love. This is a generalization and an oversimplification to be sure, but talk to anyone over the age of 35 and see what they say. Chances are good that the women are hoping great sex means long-term love. And the men are hoping great sex means long-term great sex. 

Perhaps women use sex for love and men use love for sex. And what about lust? Maybe it just helps with the sex and love parts. If that is true, then it might explain why so many relationships ultimately fail: because in the end, women and men hope to pull different things out of the lust box—women want love; men want sex. 

That is not to say that women don't want sex or that men don't want love. But my guess is that if I took a vote, women would choose love over sex in the long run, hands down. I'm not sure I could say the same for men...But maybe.

This isn't necessarily a bad thing. Women and men are cut from different fabrics based on survival patterns that evolved from the dawning of Humankind. Today these deeply rooted primal patterns have been refined into a culturally appropriate template. I imagine we each hold strong beliefs around what sex, lust and love are, and what love, in particular, should look like.

THE NATURE OF LOVE

The problem is you can't really put a thing like love into a box and expect it to slumber quietly forever. Inevitably, it will burst open because in its purest form, love is a powerful, dynamic and free energy. Inherently, it has no bounds. Trying to make it conform to any particular shape is futile.

This may also be true for sex and lust. Perhaps the real struggle  we face is in our trying to make these dynamic energies static? Perhaps culturally we simply feel safer and more comfortable knowing these powerful energies are contained rather than wild. Wild anything in this culture tends to get a bad rap but particularly when it comes to sex, lust and love. Just look at Hollywood, for example.

WHAT ABOUT RELATIONSHIPS?

Now that we've distilled all of this down, what does it mean in terms of relationships? The bottom line is there is no bottom line. The arena of relationships is a complex, multi-layered  and dynamic beast.  There is no right, wrong, or one way to do them. 

Sex, lust, love and relationships mean different things to different people. And there are a number of things that impact how  a person treats them. Plus, since lust and love are dynamic energies, they change, making it impossible to predict the course of any relationship.

The key is to align with what feels best to you. It doesn't matter what that is; you just have to align with it. And realign with it (or not) as it changes. That's the thing about relationships—they invite us to risk, open, grow and evolve. They are our greatest opportunities to learn about ourselves. Without others to challenge us, we stagnate and have little idea of who we truly are.

So who are we, truly? I believe that at our core, we are pure, unconditional love. Being in relationships challenges us to reconnect with that core or true nature. To do that, we must be willing to give up our ego drives and desires, fears and threats, wounds and stories. We must allow our hearts to heal and open instead of fester and close. Authentic loving is not for the timid!

But it is possible. Reaching a state of unattached, unconditional or authentic loving is what many traditions call bliss or enlightenment. And it is what many of us believe we are here to do—evolve on a spiritual level. Viewing your life experiences through the lens of spiritual evolution is a game-changer. It turns pain into power. 

REACHING FOR AUTHENTIC LOVE

The place to start this journey is with awareness of your truth. As you learn to honor your inner truth, your being becomes clear and light. The more clear and light you become on the inside, the more clear and light your life becomes on the outside. Because your external life is nothing more than a reflection of your internal life.

It works the same way for your relationships. The more clear and light you are on the inside, the more clear and light your relationships become on the outside. What you don't want falls away and what you want rises to the surface, because when you view your life as a spiritual journey, obstacles become opportunities.

There is no point to sacrificing what you want—your truth—out of fear, especially when it comes to love. All that does is muddy up the energy, leaving you with a cloudy, confusing mess to sort out. Don't be fooled; there is no scarcity of love in this Universe! Love has been, is, and always will be waiting for you. All you have to do is open to receive it. 

Love Your Self Enough To Walk Away

If you have never had someone you love turn on you, consider yourself lucky. And quite rare. Unfortunately, the people we trust to love us the most are often the ones who hurt us the most. That is because we have the most to lose in relation to them.

When we love someone and they love us too, we want to believe we are safe with them because we all need a safe haven to rest into. Life can be tough and dangerous. If we can't trust the people we love and who love us, who can we trust?

LEARNING ABOUT LOVE

Our families give us our first experiences of loving. By virtue of being family, we love them and they love us. We can trust them; or we'd like to think so, anyway. We're blood. They would never turn their backs on us...right? We want to believe they will stand behind us no matter what, and especially through the challenges of our lives.

But family dynamics are a powerful thing. Over the course of a lifetime, we form unconscious roles and patterns with them that are deeply entrenched in our relationships. And without even realizing it, we work hard to keep those roles in place so we know how and where we fit in to the picture.

In fact, we are so invested in fitting in that many will turn on each other to ensure they still do. I have witnessed family members hurting each other over things like attention, acceptance, power, love and money. I have seen them lie, steal, manipulate, stab each other in the back, gossip about each other, call each other despicable names, hit, and even sue each other. Perhaps you have experienced one or more of these in your own family.

THE WOUND OF BEING DENIED

But there is one thing a family can do that shakes us to our core, and that is to not believe us when we tell the truth. There is something deeply wounding about that - the act of being denied our truth by our own family. It is natural to feel betrayed, rejected, or dismissed any time this happens, but especially when it happens with family. We feel unseen, unheard, disrespected, and disempowered. We get defensive because our authenticity and truth - who we are - is rejected. 

Ultimately, people believe what they want to believe, and they have personal (often sub or unconscious) reasons for doing so. But when it is our own family who rejects us - our blood, our safe haven - it can seem as though we have nowhere to go and no one in the world we can trust. This can leave us with a deep emotional wound, feeling alone, hurt, uncertain, anxious, betrayed, and afraid to trust our selves and others.

WHY WE STAY

Sometimes we stay in dysfunctional or toxic relationships well past the point of them being anything close to healthy or safe for us - especially with family and if our earlier relationships with them were loving - because we cling to the hope that it will change. We see the potential of its restoration and we get hooked by that potential. We want to believe it can and will change back to being supportive, respectful, and loving. And we may spend years in suffering waiting for that change to happen.

Other times we stay because the situation feels familiar, even if the relationship is dysfunctional or toxic. We grew up with it; we have enough experience to anticipate its rhythms and know what to do. If we walk away, we have no idea what will be there for us; but if we stay, we do. And some part of us feels safer with the familiar than the unknown.

Still other times we stay because we do not believe we deserve anything more; we do not feel worthy of authentic love. Most of us do not even know what authentic love is. Our culture is riddled with examples of inauthentic love and toxic relating. In my women's facebook group, After A Breakup: Finding Peace and Power, I hear story after story of women dealing with the aftermath of an abusive relationship. Many women struggle to leave it behind even when their life is in danger!

This struggle within intimate relationships points to a lack of self-worth that comes from a deep inner wound. And that wound typically starts in our family and then gets played out in future relationships. If we do not learn to accept, respect or value our selves, we do not own self-worth. And without self-worth, we do not authentically love ourselves. And if we do not authentically love ourselves, we cannot give and receive authentic love with anyone else.

WHEN TO LEAVE

Sometimes our family's behavior becomes so toxic that we must walk away from them in order to preserve ourselves. It is never an easy decision to leave those we love, and want so badly to love us in return. We want to believe that our family would never turn their backs on us. Yet if we do not walk away from a toxic situation, we are turning our backs on ourselves. And that is never a good idea! We must love ourselves best, before we can truly experience authentic loving with anyone else.

It breaks my heart, how those we love the most are the ones capable of hurting us the most. Unfortunately, it happens more often than any of us want to believe. And when it happens, it can be a challenge to get the clarity needed to know what to do about it...especially when it is our own family - our safe haven.

WHAT YOU CAN DO

You cannot make others believe you or even see things your way. But you can maintain your integrity despite your family's behavior. You can take the high road and disengage from their power games. And you can stand solidly in your truth, knowing it inside, no matter what anyone else says. Ultimately, your truth is between you and a Higher Power anyway. And true redemption comes from within.

As a child you have little, if any, influence over the dynamics of your family. But as an adult, you can empower your self around them. There are many ways to do so, and it is important to find one that feels best for you. This might include:

• having a difficult, straight-forward conversation with a family member; 
• calling a family meeting with everyone involved; 
• continuing to observe in silence for clarification; 
• reaching out to several family members for perspective; 
• writing letters to one or more family members;
• setting clear boundaries with one or more family members; or 
• letting one or more family members go from your life

If you do nothing to free your self from dysfunctional or toxic family relating, you walk a long and painful plank to desolation. Your body, mind and spirit suffer. You become diminished in your sense of self-worth and value. Your capacity to trust your self and others fades. And your heart closes, putting authentic love out of reach. 

There is no good reason to tolerate relationships that disregard and hurt you, especially within your own family. 

• It is not healthy. 
• It does not provide security. 
• It is not all you deserve. 
• You cannot change or fix it alone. 
• They are not the only ones who will "love" or be there for you.
• And it does not serve you to stay. 

To believe otherwise is error thinking.

If your family or someone you love has rejected your truth, if they are disrespecting and disregarding you, or otherwise hurting you, find the courage to take action on your behalf. It may resolve more easily than you imagine. Or you may find that walking away from them is necessary to preserve your self and your integrity. 

Distancing your self from your family or other hurtful people in your life does not have to mean you no longer love them; and it does not have to be forever. But if your relationship with them is unhealthy, dysfunctional, abusive or toxic, it may serve you to leave them for now. Because staying in such a relationship will only continue to diminish you. And nothing loving ever comes of that. ❤

Turn February 14th into a day of empowerment

If you read my last post, 7 Kinds of "Love" Plus 5 Ways to Love Your Single Self on Valentine's Day, you already have an idea of how I feel about February 14th. So I thought I would take it one step further.

Let me guess: without even reading this blog, you know it is about Valentine's Day because of course everyone knows that February 14th is Valentine's Day; and everyone knows if you don't bring your beloved some flowers or chocolates on that day, you're a schmuck...right? Right. 

But did you also know that on this date, Oregon became the 33rd and Arizona the 48th states of the Union? Or that the first US state bird refuge was authorized in California? Or that Venus was discovered as a morning star and an evening star? Or that James Knox Polk - our 11th President - became the first to have his photo taken? Or that the US Parcel Service as well as the League of Women Voters were formed? Or that Aretha Franklin recorded the single Respect? I bet not. And those are just a few of the many significant events on this historical date.

Tomorrow is the day - V-Day for short - for 2018...the day flower shops and chocolate makers love. It's the day we are supposed to show our beloveds just how much we love them by buying them something special. And if we don't or they don't,  people are left feeling disappointed, unloved, and lonely. It doesn't matter how much love we show or share the rest of the 364 days of the year; it's V-Day that counts the most toward our annual love score, if you keep one.

So I suggest a rewrite for this day...

If the magic of V-Day is little more than a product  of  creative marketing, why not turn it into a day that leaves us all feeling empowered and whole rather than disappointed, unloved, or lonely? 

For instance, we could all reserve our hate for this one day and share our love with each other the rest of the 364 days of the year. Or we could reserve our negative self-talk for this one day and speak sweet nothings to ourselves the rest of the year. Or my personal favorite for 2018: we could use this day to empower ourselves by practicing forgiveness via the Ho'Oponopono Method. 

If you've never heard of Ho'Oponopono, it comes to us from Dr. Ihaleakala Hew Len of Hawai'i and is one part of an ancient healing practice that is used to mend conflicts between two parties. You may be familiar with it through the writings of Joe Vitale who is responsible for popularizing it on the Mainland.

At the core of Ho'Oponopono is the understanding that we are all interconnected and inseparable at the level of consciousness. So how we treat ourselves literally impacts others; and how we treat others literally impacts ourselves, beginning at the level of our thoughts. 

This metaphysical concept has floated around the spiritual arena for centuries, but it wasn't until Dr. Len proved it in a very real way that it got mainstream America's attention. How did he do it, you ask? Well, he literally healed insane patients by working on himself. Yep, that's right; a whole institution full of them, which is now closed. For the fascinating details about this, Google his name and read all about it online. Here is a good article to start with: http://healingearth.info/hooponopono/.

Mind you, this is an oversimplification of the practice, yet when done correctly, it is exceptionally powerful. For purposes of this blog, what I want you to know is that with this one simple practice, you can turn your V-Day blues into a powerful opportunity that will transform your life. The key is not only  to grasp the concepts in your mind, but to drop into their truth in your heart. 

In context with another spiritual principle - that what you focus on expands and what you resist persists - Ho'Oponopono becomes a powerful tool for transformation. All you have to know is that when you align your consciousness with the frequency of Love instead of all the other stuff, amazing miraculous things can happen. In Dr. Len's own words: 

"So sometimes it seems as if we are powerless to change things. If we are suffering from depression or some kind of terrible relationship, or we are in the midst of a crisis, all we have to remember is, we hold the power and we can help the situation by maintaining our focus and opening to the greatest power in the universe, Love."

So on V-Day, opening your consciousness and your self to Love  with a capital "L" can be a game-changer. Even your most painful relationships can shift. Especially when you feel hurt, angry, betrayed, and alone. Because it is only through love that you can truly heal. And Dr. Len's brilliant work proved this.

By this, I don't mean that you run out and spew your deepest desires on anyone! I mean that you sit alone in a private setting, tap into your deepest heart, feel the connection between your pain and everyone else's, and practice Ho'Oponopono. 

So how do you do Ho'Oponopono?

It's very simple. First, you apologize for the pain and ask for forgiveness. And then you give gratitude for the connection and the offering of and opportunity for forgiveness. And then you give Love. Simple, right? Sure! 

The key is getting yourself in the head and heart space of truly feeling the connection between your pain and everyone else's, not only knowing it in your mind but feeling the truth of it in your heart. Otherwise, this won't work. It may take some practice, and maybe even more research on what Ho'Oponopono is all about. But if you want to, you can transform your life with this technique. Hey, if a bunch of insane people can be cured, what's a little pain and heartache by comparison?

Once you "get it" and drop into that space of feeling your connection and oneness to the people you are wanting to heal around, you say these four simple phrases:

1) I'm sorry.

2) Please forgive me. 

3) Thank you.

4) I love you.

And you mean it. You won't have to mean it if you really feel it; it will just be the case that you do. And if you don't really feel it, it won't work because you will still be stuck in a separation mindset and heart space. That's the key - you must feel the very real connection between your self and all others, and recognize their pain as yours, so that as you heal your self through your consciousness, you heal them and your relationship to them. Powerful stuff, huh?

This does not mean you become besties or re-engage in an active relationship with them. And certainly not if the person you are healing around was abusive or toxic. What it does mean is that how you relate to them shifts inside of you. You stop all the resistance so you can release the pain; and you focus your consciousness on Love rather than hate so you can expand the frequency of Love in your life instead of hate. This is so important!

So why not give V-Day a powerful new meaning for yourself this year? After all, it does you no good to stew in your pain and heartache, blame and hate and hurt. All that does is keep you stuck in suffering. And since we're all connected, thanks but no thanks! Do yourself and everyone else a favor by trying Ho'Oponopono on for size this V-Day. And if you want, buy yourself a box of chocolates too. That never hurts. 

[drcecizuniga.com    After A Breakup    CZ Mentoring, LLC]

Come Present

Hello Friends!
It has been a while; life is full and I was delayed in connecting with you. Today I feel compelled to blog about coming present with what is.

We find ourselves midway through October 2017 and quickly approaching Samhain (pronounced "sow-in") - the celebration behind All Hallows' Eve and modern-day Halloween. Samhain was originally celebrated to honor the spirits of the dead, for it was believed they visited the Earth on October 31st and provided insights into the future. Sacred hearth fires were burnt all night as a gesture and request for protection through the approaching darkness of the cold, harsh Winter months.

Photo by Olivia Henry on Unsplash

 

Samhain comes at an auspicious time of year when the season shifts from long, warm Summer days to long, cool Autumn nights. The color of the leaves on the trees signals the change most prominantly. Traditionally this meant the energy and activity of the season was shifting too: crop growing was done and harvesting began.

Photo by Evgeni Evgeniev on Unsplash

Though our context may be different, these same shifts apply to us today, if more to our internal world than our external one. Our body wisdom responds to the energetic shifts inherent in the change of seasons. And if we pay close attention, we may feel a shift in what we long to do that mirrors this change.

While Summer is typically filled with a lot of external busyness and play, Autumn beckons us to start slowing down and bring more presence to what is...to take stock of what we've created in our lives, trash what didn't work, harvest what did, and be grateful for it all.

Today we can use the symbology of Samhain this way:

• honor and release what no longer serves your life (the crops that did not grow or no longer serve your life; your "dead")
• claim what does (the crops that grew to enhance your life; your "harvest")
• be grateful for what is (all the gifts born of your year and your life so far, both tangible and intangible)  

 

Photo by Simon Maage on Unsplash

 

You might want to write down the things you are releasing and ceremonially burn the paper; you might also want to make note of the gifts of your harvest and ceremonially bury the paper. By honoring the ancient Samhain tradition in this way, you can clear your energetic field, gain perspective, and better prepare for what approaches next.

This placement of your attention is a powerful tool to keep you present with what is, in a way that leads to the next aligned step toward right action in your life, rather than getting caught up in messy distractions and distorted reactions that don't serve. I define right actions as those based in love, and distorted actions as those based in fear. For what it's worth, now is a great time to be curious, to stretch beyond your comfort zone, and to choose love above fear.

Photo by Jez Timms on Unsplash

Each and every one of us is called to stop being shy, and to step into right, aligned action for ourselves and for the greater reality of which we are a part. For what better purpose is there to life than serving the world in a way that leads to positive changes for you and for all the beings you share this Planet home with? I can't think of any...

Until next time, fare thee well my friends,
Dr. Ceci Zuniga

In the name of LIFE

 A few nights ago I went to a world-wide screening of a new film called "Unity." It was...well, quite frankly, disturbing. I nearly walked out within the first 10 minutes. Instead, I covered my eyes, sat in my seat and sobbed at the suffering being shown. It was not fiction; it was life - the suffering in this life that we humans have created and that we maintain through things like war, and how we feed ourselves. It was a sort of documentary. I felt compelled to stay, though at the time I was uncertain as to why. Typically, I would have left immediately.

In hindsight I realize there was a part of me ready to bridge the gap, to change my choice of not looking to looking, to feel the reality of what humanity has created, to fully step into the realm of Oneness and to recognize that on some level, I am contributing to the horrors shown...perhaps through apathy, denial, resistance, justification, by being choosey about what I allow into my consciousness...

It took all my conviction to stay in that theater, watching the reality before me. It is one thing to read and hear about such things; it is quite another to watch their painful unfolding and feel it throughout my body as if it were happening to me. Now I know that it was happening to me. It does happen to me, because on the most intimate level of being, there is no separation. The experience, at times, was nearly unbearable and was certainly traumatic...as it should be. Only a sociopath might watch such a film and feel something other than complete disgust and deep compassion.

I presume the intent of this hard-hitting film was to shake people out of their comfort zones, to fling us out of complacency into a place where we can no longer deny the brutality we participate in every day, even if by default...and not just to other Homo Sapiens but to all creatures that share this life, this planet with us. Important questions were raised...

For instance, 

• How is it that one can condone and allow horrific stockyards for the inhumane growing and slaughtering of cows, pigs, turkeys and chickens in the United States yet scoff at how the Chinese handle dogs and cats in the same inhumane ways in their country? 
• How is it that one can justify eating sea-dwelling creatures but not land-dwelling creatures? What about sky-dwelling creatures? 
• What makes the life of a shrimp or a crab any less significant than the life of a cow or a chicken? What about a horse or a dog or a cat? A clam?
• What is it that puts the value of one living creature's life above or below the value of another living creature's life? 
  

Every creature values its life and wants to have it just as we do ours. They also have a right to have it, just as we do ours. We may believe we can speak for them, choose for them, disregard them for our own purposes but that is not ours to do. Their life is not ours to overtake. It is no more or less valuable than our own life is in the whole of creation. They do not want it taken away from them any more than we want ours taken away from us, especially without consideration and in fact, with complete disregard. Why would they? Why would we? Why would any living creature?

For many of our fellow creatures, we take their babies, their freedom and ultimately their lives. We separate them from their family, their clans, their tribes and even their homes. We use them for selfishness and greed in the name of survival, sustenance or even worse, pleasure or entertainment but this is a great lie. It is the error thinking of our ego. It is nothing more than the brutality and insanity of what I now call species slavery: exhausting labor, drudgery, bondage, one life sacrificed without regard...

And by whose authority? None of us - not one of us among the race of Homo Sapiens has the authority to say one life is more or less valuable than any other, or in essence: My life is more valuable than yours; your life is less valuable than mine. Money does not give one that authority; nor does power. Some may take it, but it is not theirs to take. Life belongs to us all, period. It was given to us all by the same loving Source. No species has a right to dominate any other. We are not the same, but we are equal.

Spiritual master S'rila Prabhupada once said, "As a state is protected by the department of law and order, so the state of the universe, of which this earth is only an insignificant fragment, is protected by the laws of nature. This material nature is one of the various potencies of God, who is the ultimate proprietor of everything that be. This earth is, therefore, the property of God, but we, the living entities, especially the so-called civilized human beings, are claiming God's property as our own under both an individual and collective false conception. If you want peace, you have to remove this false conception from your mind and from the world. This false claim of proprietorship by the human race is partly or wholly the cause of all disturbances of peace on earth." 

There are those that will argue to maintain the brutality in the name of livelihood, survival, necessity, etc. but these excuses are all lies. Many lies are used to maintain species slavery today. It does not have to be this way. We can change this tragic trajectory, but it will take a major overhaul among the lives of Homo Sapiens. 

• It means that as Homo Sapiens, we relinquish our false conception of proprietorship of the earth and its creatures back to God, by whatever name you choose to call that creative life Source and force.
• It means that as Homo Sapiens, we agree to turn away from the destructive brutalities of war and turn instead toward peace, acceptance, compassion and collaboration.
• It means we get rid of the industrialization of our food system and return to local, sustainable food systems that do not prioritize or include meats and flesh of our fellow creatures. 
• It means many livelihoods change form. 
• It means laws align with the affirmation of all life forms. 
• It means, above all, that we come to view life on this planet as one living organism of which Homo Sapiens are but a tiny part of a much larger whole comprised of many, many species...not the same, but equal....equal in terms of our right to and desire for life and freedom and peace, no matter what.

To say I cried a lot during the film is an understatement. I sobbed deeply at times, for the breaking of my heart at the brutality being witnessed, and knowing that it happens every single day across the globe on a mighty scale. I spent hours crying and meditating when I got home, saying Ho'Oponopono and doing recapitulation, feeling the pain and suffering Homo Sapiens inflict on our own species and on other species of this world seemingly without regard, as if we are separate from them, better than them. And that was the key to this film.

In realizing once and for all that there is no separation of life - that what one life suffers we all suffer - we find compassion, the kind of compassion it takes to make something different happen. 

• Only by choosing to see the brutal truth of what we have created in this world, are still creating, can we change it. The reasons we got here no longer matter; it is time for change. 
• Only by recognizing how we participate in the suffering as Homo Sapiens can we change it. 
• Only by acknowledging that everything here is sacred - animals, birds, people, plants, sea creatures - can we stop the brutality. 

What we do to ourselves and to other species is disturbing, traumatic... insane even. We shy away from responsibility for things we are not a direct part of and yet we do participate as members of the Human species, Homo Sapiens. In the film, they used the term Homo Spiritual to describe the next level of our evolution. This means we evolve past the point of believing in the (ego) illusion of separation. This means we evolve to view all life as sacred and equal. This means we evolve to coexist in balance, harmony, compassion, collaboration and egalitarianism. Homo Spiritual: humans who have evolved beyond the drives of their egos to a place of true Oneness where every living creature can thrive in life.

This is ours to rectify. This is ours to balance and harmonize because it is the species of Homo Sapiens that perpetuate it. Start now, today, somewhere, somehow, with one loving, compassionate choice. It is time. It will take every single one of us to change what we have created and continue to support, even if by choosing not to look too closely. No one is excluded from the brutality of this creation...no one...because we are this creation and this creation is us. 

Do not close your eyes or your heart any longer. It is time. Please. In the name of life...